Teeniest Request

This day’s post brought to you by this random word generator.

“Hey, Geoff, I have a favor to ask of you,” Ryan said.

“Yeah, what is it?” Geoff asked.

Ryan tried very hard not to make a Nedroid reference (and by Ryan, I meant me).

“My family is trapped on Mt. Everest, and I need to borrow a helicopter to -” Ryan began, but Geoff already flew over and brought back Ryan’s family.

“Wow! That was fast!” Ryan exclaimed. “Thank you sooo much Geoff! I owe you bit time.”

“No problem Ryan, think nothing of it. It was easy,” Geoff said. “But, there is something you can do for me…”

“Sure! What is it?”

“Well… I have just the teeniest request…can you sharpen this pencil for me?” Geoff asked. He held a yellow #2 pencil towards Ryan.

“Oh, is that all? I guess so, sure,” Ryan said. He reached towards the pencil and grabbed it. Geoff let go, and Ryan suddenly felt as though a car was dropped in his hand. The two ton pencil smashed his hand to the ground.

“Is there a problem?” Geoff asked.

His hand stung, but Ryan grunted, “Urgh, no, huff huff, no problem, urgh, at all.” With both hands, Ryan dragged the pencil across the floor. The heavy pencil screeched against the steel floor, and sparks flew out. Ryan’s heart pounded, and sweat stained his whole body. After several agonizing moments, he finally got the pencil to the electric sharpener.

Ryan carried the sharpener down to the ground, which was much lighter. However, the sharpener was locked with a sliding block puzzle. After three grueling hours, Ryan thought he would get a stroke from infuriation. He was no where near close to solving the puzzle yet.

“How’s it going?” Geoff called from across the room.

“…Fine…just fine…” Ryan grunted. “C-can I have a glass of water?” He felt exhausted. This was the most strenuous request he had ever taken.

“Sorry, that’s much too difficult of a task,” Geoff said. He glanced over at Ryan. “Oh, my pencil sharpener is broken. You’ll have to find another one.


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