The Only Story With a Moral You Will Ever Have To Tell Your Kids

I woke up to see a water buffalo in my room.

No, not one of those water buffaloes. A normal buffalo, except its body was completely composed of water. Which, I guess isn’t too normal.

The buffalo’s hooves soaked my carpet where it touched my bedroom floor. It began tromping around my bedroom and nudging everything, and thus soaking everything, as if it were intentionally trying to annoy me.

After it finished up my room, it stared straight at me with its pupil-less eyes, so close that I could see tiny air bubbles in its face, and the current of water flowing through its nonexistent lungs.

“Moo,” it finally said.

I felt confused. What was the buffalo trying to say? I had a premonition it was trying to say something important, a universal truth perhaps.

The buffalo plunged its hooves into my chest, breaking all of my ribs. For something made of water, it felt quite solid.

Suddenly, my eyes were open. I realized now, the truth. The meaning of it all.

“Thank you water buffalo,” I said, with a tear in my eye. Whether it be a tear of gratitude or pain, I will never know, for the tear shapeshifted into a waterthrush. Not a thrush made of water, but the actual animal waterthrush. Boring.

MORALS OF THE STORY:

Hard work will grant you success.
Don’t tell lies.
Greed leads you to lose what you already have.
Those who help receive help in return.
Friendship is the strongest thing.
Never give up.
Stay humble.
Looks are deceiving, it’s the inner beauty that counts.
Treat others the way you want to be treated.
Money is overrated.
They lived happily ever after.

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