Omigosh Lollipop Land! Rolling hills covered in green grass stretched out in front of me, dotted with colorful little flowers of all sorts of colors. I picked up a red flower next to my feet by its white stem. When I peeled off its scarlet petals, I could hear a quiet “Owch!”. I licked the ruby center that remained, a ruby that tasted of sweet strawberry with a slight processed flavor.
There were all kinds of lollipop flower flavors. Banana, orange, grape, kiwi, blueberry, and peach. The red and green spirals were watermelon, and I had a hard time telling the difference between strawberry and cherry. My personal favorite was lemon flavor. I lay down on the soft, warm grass, smelling the drowsy air as it blue past my nose. I picked up a vividly bright yellow flower, and crunched down on its lemony innards, and it shrieked as my teeth cracked it open.
“Stop fiend!” a tiny voice said.
“Huh?” A small rainbow lollipop with a white, stick figure frame and randomly colored petals stood before me. It wore a cute crown on its head. “And are you the kind of Lollipop Land?” I asked through a full mouth that was munching its companion.
“Lollipop Land? This is Lillippy! And I am its owner, Lillipop. I’ll have you know, you won’t be eating any of more of my citizens. Else, you face the wrath of Tattlelambie!” it exclaimed.
“Tattlelambie?” I pondered. “What a cute name.” I leaned down and bit off a piece of Lillipop. For such a colorful lollipop, it certainly didn’t taste any better than the rest of the lollipops.
“Aggh!” Lillipop screamed in agony as it held its broken face with its leafy hands. “Tattlelambie! Gore him to death!”
And under the smiling, warm sun, and amidst the peaceful, kind wind, and from the sweet, grassy hills, juxtaposed a foul, dark ox. I’m actually not sure what’s the difference between an ox and a bull, but this specific Tattlelambie had two long, twisted horns were red and striped with white, while its bloodshot eyes cried for caffeine. Its breath stank of stale cookies, its long tail whipped loudly like a dragon’s, and its black hide…was pretty normal. The Tattlelambie scratched the ground with its glowing hoofs, tearing up the grass and lollipops. Flowers sprung up where it touched the ground, but soon melted in chocolate.
I sprang to my feet, saying “I need to go to my dentist’s appointment.” I bolted.
“After him!” I heard Lillipop cry out in a strangled voice. The bull charged at me, and I’m not exactly a fast runner. I scrambled desperately, screaming at my laggy feet. My heart raced as I felt the horns touch my back. But right before its horns dug into the organs I grew to be fond of, I felt the lollipops I ate giving me a burst of energy, and I made one last sprint.
I escaped the bull for a brief moment, but it was still just a few meters behind me. On the ground, I spotted a fuzzy, brown and round animal snuffling the ground for lemon drops, a Porkinot! As it saw me and the Tattlelambie approach, it gave a shriek of terror and sprouted giant, blue wings. I grabbed the Porkinot and together we took off into the air.
Below us, the Tattlelambie fired a laser at us. Completely unexpected, I didn’t know they could do that. It scorched my arm and I lost my grip on the Porkinot, and I plummeted. Miraculously I landed on the bull’s head and knocked it unconscious. How convenient. Not so convenient, however, was the horn that stabbed my leg. Ouch. I pulled myself free and stumbled away from Lollipoppy Land.
I guess I’ll be eating ham and jammie tonight instead of lollipops.